Big trees don’t cry


2 Stars  2003/18/86m

A.k.a. Jun-Ka-Por (Thai)

“A homicidal maniac or vengeful spirit?”

Director: Worachet Nimsuwan / Writer: Sonchati / Cast: Pinpin Chanta, Chalad Na Songkla, Preeyanuch Panpradui, Goldie Stanley, Sapanut Chatwibon, Pittaya Na Ranong.

Body Count: 7

Dire-logue: “I reckon it’s the work of some psychopath.”

A ferociously cheesy Thai export with skewered echoes of Friday the 13th.

Sweet natured Pilai is the benefactor and manager of a quiet countryside resort and lives there with her mother, uncle, aunt and some cousins. Nearly all the men in her life are desperately in love with her and will seemingly go to any lengths to win her affection…even kill off the competition.

For every would-be suitor who comes into Pilai’s life – including tour operators, investors, and cops – is soon stalked, slain and relieved of their heart by a cloaked and masked figure who sings the titular song.

The killer’s identity is so blindingly obvious that the script hardly takes any steps to disguise it! But for your benefit, could it be hunky delegate Inthon? Her ill-tempered cuz Suwan? Or someone closer to home? Hint: it’s someone closer to home.

Although cheap and essentially lacklustre, there’s a so-bad-it’s-funny appeal in the discount store production values and zooming close-ups on suspicious facial tics; the score is overblown and really belongs to a high-end disaster movie. The end is a complete rip-off of The Good Son‘s unlikely climactic act, although not nearly as painstakingly overwrought.

With an unexpected twist glued on at the end, The Crying Tree manages to entertain once, but the prospect of returning to this particular resort brings with it the threat of vomit.

Super-hilarious scenes to look out for: a victim-to-be dumb enough to accept a ride in a truck driven by a masked and cloaked figure and the cop who beats Inthon with a copy of the Yellow Pages!

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