Category Archives: *Gasp!* It’s you!

*GASP!* It’s You!

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Being attacked in a car once again, here we find Nancy Stephens – Nurse Marion from the original Halloween (plus II, H20 and Kills) – as a mother out to pick up her son from school in 1979’s TV movie Death Car on the Freeway, when she honks at THE WRONG MOTORIST, a loon known as the Freeway Fiddler, who loves nothing more than ramming young female drivers off of LA’s highways, while playing hideous bluegrass fiddle music from an external speaker.

nancy stephens death car on the freeway 1979

The unseen fiend slams on the brakes when she tries to get by, and she gets caught up on his tow bar and then dragged down the freeway, while the cops give chase. It’s not clear if she survives the accident, but I hope she lived to collect her son.

*Gasp!* It’s you!

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Murder She Wrote is a flickbook of interesting actors, from big names, to has-beens, but also all manner of folks who had – or would do – a slasher pic or two.

In an episode titled Sticks & Stones, our favourite movie mom Mrs Voorhees turned up. The late, great Betsy Palmer played one of three members of a development committee who wanted to build luxury condos on some land. Of course, the person who owned said land was – gasp! – murdered, and only Jessica has the patience to work out who. Seriously, when does this woman write?

betsy palmer murder she wroteSadly, Betsy wasn’t the killer this time, but she did return to the series a few years later in another role, so fingers crossed for a thick blue sweater and some kiddie voices telling her to kill people.

*Gasp!* It’s both of you!

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Peering over the parapet of retirement for this. Mid-80s Police Academy knock off Moving Violations proved to be a regular phonebook of siblings-of-stars and slasher movie also-rans…

Most evident to me was the appearance of not one, but two alumni of The Burning, Brian Backer and Ned Eisenberg. The former is a luckless purveyor of a mobile puppet show, the latter is introduced by asking Jennifer Tilly (!) if she saw any of the first five Friday the 13th movies and later dons a hockey mask.

brian backer ned eisenberg moving violations 1985

Elsewhere, Willard Pugh from The Hills Have Eyes Part II appears, all of them under Stacy Keach’s little brother and Bill Murray’s little brother in the lead roles.

See you in a few weeks when I watch the slasher film my friend Dave was in.

*GASP!* It’s you!

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Watching an episode of the rather bleakly awesome Person of Interest this week, I was pleased to see Ned Eisenberg appear as a miserable bureaucrat. Of course, we all remember Ned for playing permanently-scowling Eddy in the infamous stars-of-the-future slasher The Burning:

ned eisenberg burning person of interest eddy

Ned also appeared in the amusing Police Academy rip-off Moving Violations in 1985, as a Friday the 13th-obsessed weirdo, hockey mask n’ all, alongside Jennifer Tilly.

Pay and play

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Want to get decapitated? Course you do! Well, now here’s your chance…

All of us have encountered Kickstarter campaigns for films that will probably never see the light of day. Or will be crap when they do.

How about one that looks like A). it will get made and B). might be pretty good?

Behold:

Pitched as a horror comedy from the get-go; a quartet of undead mass murderers are resurrected by a dodgy game of D&D at a Halloween party, thrusting a group of teens into a laughter-tinged fight for survival. Slashtastic stuff.

Take a look at the teaser trailer here.

Pay a visit to their Kickstarter page and learn how you (yeah, YOU) can contribute and even land a role as a beheadee. Though it looks like there’s only one of these prizes still up for grabs as of today.

Never fear, there are still plenty of other rewards for those who contribute, including bespoke Grindhouse posters that feature your mug, the opportunity to get your photo in the movie, bag a prop, or – and this is tempting – get to name a victim after someone you hate.

This kind of approach could well be the future of non-studio horror movies and while I’ll use this opportunity to reiterate that I am NOT involved with the production in any way, it sounds like it’ll be a lot of fun regardless. Now go and get your head cut off.

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