Tag Archives: I love Jason

Fan Service

friday the 13th vengeance 2019FRIDAY THE 13TH: VENGEANCE

3 Stars  2019/94m

“More than a fan film.”

Director/Writer: Jeremy Brown / Writers: Stacy Brown, Dustin Glen Montierth, Jason Brooks, T.C. De Witt, Mike Meade / Cast: C.J. Graham, Kelly Tappan, Luke Schuck, Steve Dash, Jason Brooks, Christian Sullivan, Natalie Schnelle, Tabitha Bastien, Ray Hopper, Jon A. Ravenholt, Diana Prince, Dan Feldmeir, Senae Loutsis, Ellen Smith, Tommy McLoughlin.

Body Count: 39+

Laughter Lines: “Maybe we should ditch the bikes and cut through the woods?”


I’ve often thought that many of the problems that have beset the Friday the 13th series might be solved if the series just became a straight-to-video show. It’d likely mean these lengthy gaps between entries would be reduced for one thing.

It seems that, tired of waiting, some folks have decided to go it alone. Never Hike Alone and its recent follow up showed how much can be achieved on micro-budgets, and Vengeance – a film actually longer than most of the originals! – landed looking like I’d expect DTV Jason to present: A little more rustic around the edges, with the requisite cheap horror trope of added lesbianism, and a redonkulously high body count.

friday the 13th vengeance 2019

Weaving a tale between the available elements, this really is a love letter chiefly to 1986’s Jason Lives, picking up in 2018 and running with the excised idea of Jason’s daddy Elias Voorhees making his long awaited debut. This point confused me somewhat – as he’d surely be around 90, but then there’s something about multiple death certificates too, so is he a ghost?? Either way, Jason resurrects from the bottom of Crystal Lake and wastes no time in squishing, impaling, hacking, and tearing limb from limb everyone he encounters. The local sheriff (the late Steve Dash, from Part 2) is keen to chalk things up to bear attacks.

Not too far away, Tommy Jarvis’ daughters Angie and Ashley are worried about their missing pa. Angie’s Jason-obsessed friend Rob agrees to help her search for him, rounding up relatives of other survivors: nieces and nephews of Ginny, Chris, and The Final Chapter‘s Rob. They’re sold on stopping Jason so head off into the wilderness where they cross paths with a Crystal Lake tour group.

friday the 13th vengeance 2019

Jason, meanwhile, has hacked his way through another tour group, and a chain gang of inmates clearing the forest, while Elias (CJ Graham) is busy hunting down the very counsellors responsible for his son’s 1957 drowning, who we get to see in a cute flashback where people say ‘fuck’ a lot more than they probably would have done back then.

Vengeance is pure love for the lore around the movies, from the font used in the credits, to the score BY HARRY MANFREDINI!!! and some truly head-tilting ideas for denouements courtesy of the J-man. My only real complaint is that it’s a very ‘busy’ film, with multiple parties in play at any one time, sending the coroner’s backlog stratospheric and a sense of futility for a couple of seemingly important characters who are summarily killed before they achieve anything, making their presence seem superfluous. It’s neither here nor there though, the people behind this have laid their adoration out for all to see and it’s something really worth the time of any Crystal Lake fan.

A sequel followed in 2022.

friday the 13th vengeance

Cold Blooded

never hike in the snow 2020

NEVER HIKE IN THE SNOW

3 Stars  2020/31m

Director/Writer: Vincente DiSanti / Cast: Thom Mathews, Vinny Guastaferro, Bryan Forrest, Courtlan Gordon, Anna Campbell, Vincent DiSanti.

Body Count: 2


Released on the same day as the all-encompassing Friday the 13th Blu Ray box set, this prequel to the 2017 54-minute fan film that out fanned and out filmed all of its competitors serves as a sort of ‘expansion pack’ to build on its new little Jason-verse.

A teen photographer flees through the snow-carpeted forest floor in the vicinity of Camp Crystal Lake but is caught before he can reach his car by an unwelcoming Jason, who’s probably just trying to kick back and stay warm in his cabin. (J uses a bow and arrow for what feels like the first time?)

Local Sheriff Rick Cologne – Part VI alumni Vincent Guastaferro, one of the few second-tier characters to survive originally – instructs a young deputy to salt over the bloodstains while he goes to talk to the mom of the missing teen, discovering he’d purposefully gone looking for the old camp.

A spanner is thrown into Cologne’s approach in the form of Tommy Jarvis, who is intent on finishing off Jason all over again. Things culminate with the young deputy happening on the camp and seeing a light in a window… Don’t do it, dude.

never hike in the snow 2020

Because it doesn’t have the contained story Never Hike Alone afforded itself, Snow feels a tad superfluous by comparison, but with the knowledge the producers plan on further films, it’s a necessary puzzle piece. In its favour, it’s as marvellously made as its predecessor, with majestic aerial shots bringing us in, has great acting from everybody involved and even a glimpse of Mrs Voorhees.

Blurbs-of-interest: Campbell and DiSanti were in fellow fan film Jason Rising in 2021.

Most Wanted

As I type, 40 years ago they were likely coming to the end of the Friday the 13th Part 2 shoot and during post-production and MPAA back-and-forths, much of Carl Fullerton’s marvellous FX work would be scissored from the movie, seemingly forever.

VHS came and went, with a much-seen shot of this absent gorefest on the back of the box of a European release. I first saw the film in the summer of 1996 and was curiously disappointed about its omission. When DVD came along and several insert shots in some of the later films were restored, we all hoped Part 2‘s shish-ke-bob impalement kill of Jeff and Sandra would show up. Nuh-uh.

jeff sandra friday the 13th part 2

There was the From Crystal Lake to Manhattan box set with its Killer Extras disc, featuring cut footage from the other movies, but not Part 2. There were the deluxe editions that had ‘slashed scenes’ as extras on the other films, but not Part 2. There was the 2013 deluxe 8-film set on Blu Ray with more new extras for the other films, but still no sign of the excised scenes.

Interwebz rumours had long pointed towards Fullerton possessing the footage and I’ve seen countless petitions and campaigns over the years to try and locate it to no avail.

And then came Scream Factory.

What my friend Ross correctly dubbed ‘the last word’ on the franchise sees all 12 movies together for the first time in one cutely decorated box, 16 discs in all, confined only to Region-A Blu Ray.

scream factory friday the 13th box

So I bought a multi region Blu Ray player.

Amazon Canada were doing the sweetest deal, but then suddenly the page said they couldn’t/wouldn’t ship to Europe. Amazon US were charging more but there were no shipping issues it seemed, just a long-ass wait for Jason’s TransAtlantic voyage (not via the Lazarus), but eventually a 2-day wait from a UK-based eBayer had the box turn up on Saturday morning at 9am.

I rugby dived to the player, dog crazily running around hoping the big box contained biscuits or tennis balls, and in went Part 2. Of course, the player revved up like some Lovecraftian God awakened from centuries of slumber; the TV kept telling me the remote was now usable for the player as well; the don’t-copy-this-disc warning seemed to remain on screen for hours.

But there it was, on the extras menu: Slashed scenes.

PLAY.

A mere song-length of extended and unseen takes from my favourite slasher movie of all time unfurled before my hazy morning eyes.

  • Alice vs. Icepick
  • Crazy Ralph’s last hurrah – 12″ extended disco mix
  • The doomed Deputy’s hammer-to-the-head
  • More of Scott’s savage throat slashing
  • A micro-second longer of poor wheelchair-bound Mark’s blade to the face
  • Vickie’s stabbing
  • An I-can’t-see-a-difference Jason-through-the-window take
  • Mrs Voorhees’ head.

But the reason I signed on for all this madness, ordered the damn thing three times, and have become a Blu Ray lackie: Jeff and Sandra.

Maybe it’s my age, but compared to the other scenes, this is the only one I think was a real loss for the movie, an actual robbery of essential content, unlike slightly longer shots of the other denouements, the entire removal of what happens to them subtracted a lot of power from the scenario.

It lasts longer than I thought, comprising several shots as they writhe silently (no sound made it for any of the footage) and Jason grinds the spear through them in an almost humiliating demise.

I was 2 when this was shot. I’m 42 now. Thank you Scream Factory. It was worth the wait.

me-friday

VIP’s of Slasherdom: Chewie

While I often opine that the 2009 Friday the 13th reboot peaked in the opening 20 minutes, with the rest of the film merely a serviceable slasher yarn, one character really stood out in the group of college kids on the conveyor belt of death… It’s Chewie! (who I thought was named Troy for ages).

aaron yoo friday the 13th 2009

“Shoot the boooooot!”

Why is he there? Dorm-dwelling collegiate, bong-enthusiast, best bud of Lawrence, and pretend-friend to the arsey rich host, Trent, Chewie is on the trip for the chance to see how the other half live. Not because he likes Trent or anything. Duh.

What does he want? Like most boys who visit the shores of Crystal Lake, Chewie just wants to get stoned and get laid, preferably by Bree, but admits he has more chance of fucking a penguin.

Why we love him: Yoo was able to inject so much into what amount to probably less than 15 minutes of screentime with pitch perfect delivery of lines, even babbling to himself as he drunkenly explores the toolshed and helps himself to rich folks’ wine.

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